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 Is the clock ticking for you at the Pearly Gates? ☺

A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in front of the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, ‘What are all those clocks?’
St. Peter answered, ‘Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone who has ever lived on earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie, the hands on your clock move.’
‘Oh’, said the man. ‘Whose clock is that? ‘
’That’s Mother Teresa’s,” replied St. Peter. “The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.”
‘Incredible’, said the man. ‘And whose clock is that one?’
 St. Peter responded, ‘That’s Abraham Lincoln’s clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abraham told only two lies in his entire life.’
‘Where’s Daniel Andrews’ clock?’ asked the man.
 St. Peter replied, ‘Jesus has it in his office.. He uses it as a ceiling fan…’

{ 6 comments… add one }
  • Pensioner Pete 28/09/2020, 6:11 am

    Quite appropriate in these troubled times. 😉

  • Penguinite 28/09/2020, 7:32 am

    Andrews may need to re use his clock as a heleicopter and do a US evac of Saigon. We could rename it Dangon. Sort of fits with his Chinese escape route. Except, of course, Dan’s going to hell!

  • Lorraine 28/09/2020, 7:40 am

    We must make a joke and that keeps us sane. Daniel Andrews lies smoothly each time he opens his mouth. His mother must have been troubled as they usually grow out of it.

  • Tony H 28/09/2020, 9:07 am

    Hahahahaha, brilliant I have copied it and sent it to my family. 😂😅👍🤣😎

  • Ozman 28/09/2020, 9:21 am

    What really gets up most people’s nose, the self-righteous ones that is, Daniel Andrews only has to repent and be truly sorry for what he is doing and he will be forgiven. Apparently, the scoffers are the ones who suffer in eternity.
    That message Jesus has, being only person recorded in history to have risen from the dead, is a real pain…for the self righteous. Death gets us all, evidently. But being born to die sucks! Makes a fool of us all. Work. Save. Invest. Get taxed. Die.
    Cheer up! Have a look on the brighter side of life! It’s a better view from here. So dan’s fans think, as they spin away.

  • J D 28/09/2020, 5:18 pm

    He’s doing it for Bill Gates of Hell.
    Being paid to drive Victorians to a vaccination.
    He’s simply repeating the big lie that’s floating around the world.
    Pray that Victorians don’t buy it.

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